Diary: bitchin

The one thing I hate more than realizing that I should stop relying on my family to keep me informed and accept the responsibility by asking the necessary questions is being told of the fact with righteous indignation as if I, on purpose, disregard those around me. Finally, even though a long time ago I may have promised to never do so, this morning I’ve resorted to the cliche American “whatever” in response to being dogged for “all the right reasons”. Ugh…

This weekend I realized that I don’t live in time. I live in now. The past is something I dwell on, an almost boundless source of both happiness and guilt. The future – a light at the end of the tunnel that hopefully doesn’t turn out to be an oncoming truck. The present on the other hand… Though making such extreme statements almost automatically turns me into a hypocrite. Perhaps that’s the function of hypocrisy – a negative-feedback mechanism to prevent one from veering from the truth, which, for the most part, is fairly natural.

Whatever. I still had an awesome weekend.

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